My life, my life, my life in the sunshine!

Well, it's nearing my Tricennial, my Pearl Anniversary, in four years, on the same day as Britney Spears, Lucy Liu, Nelly Furtado, Teairra Marie, and, my favorite Sagittarius, from HBO's Cathouse, Isabella Soprano (just some gift ideas), I will be turning 30. One of my best friends reminded me of this the other day (thanks, you fucking downer). You know how somebody tells you that a deadline is imminent, and your mind starts processing a whole bunch of shit it wasn't ready to? Yeah, I had that moment. I started thinking about careers, houses, cars, children, and other adult things (you thought I was going to say marriage, right? Do I look like a chick, huh?). I guess that 30 would be too early to have a midlife crisis, so I guess I'll just have an early life crisis. You know the questions that run through your head. Have I wasted 30 years of my life? Have I accomplished any of the goals I set (I never set any, so I'm cool)? Am I ready to grow up? What am I going to do with the rest of my life? And just like you, I have no answers (unlike you, I don't care).




So, I'm sitting here, guzzling a Heineken, thinking about the questions I will ultimately have to answer. You remember when you were a child, you looked at adults and thought that they were having fun being grown ups. They didn't have homework, they did whatever they wanted, they didn't have all the stupid rules that you had, and they didn't have to answer to stupid grown ups. And what did you realize when you became an adult? That was all bullshit! You started working and realized that this is a lot like school, which sucked. Yeah, you get paid, but you have to pay bills now. You can't just do whatever you want, you have responsibilities now. At least you don't have the stupid rules, right? Wrong, you have more rules, and these rules have worst consequences. Remember when you got into a fight and your punishment was a time-out (ass-whipping in my case), well now if you get into a fight, you punishment is jail. Oh, and the not answering to stupid grown ups, what about that? If you're at work, look over at your supervisor, he's definitely a grown up and most likely a stupid one. If you're at home or at Starbucks, open another window and go to http://www.whitehouse.org/, that has got to be the stupidest grown up around. So, is being an adult as cool as it looked like when you were a child?




To answer all those question that went through my mind, I have no answers! I don't know where I'm going, I don't know what I'm doing, I don't know where I'll be, I'm just hoping for the best. I was reading my brother's blog, and I got to an entry, and it made me think. Hey, if my brother is Earl Hickey, I must be Randy Hickey. Maybe I do need to reevaluate my life. Pretty soon I'll be in a hotel room with my brother, riding around in my crappy car, getting into wacky shenanigans. Hey, that doesn't sound too bad at all!

My brother and I. Oh, and a hot Latina that I'm married to. Cool

Remember the world is Diggie. Even the "Butterfly" told you this was a Diggie-ble Planet. I'm cool like that!

What would it take to authenticate my niggerness?

So, a while back I was checking out this website that my brother put me up on (what up, S.), it's entitled Stuff White People Like, very interesting and entertaining. One problem though, as I continued reading the posts, I noticed something. I noticed that I like most of this stuff too. I like coffee, I love sweaters, I rock scarves year round, I enjoy sushi, the Daily Show, wine, New Balance kicks, threatening to move to Canada, etc.. In all honesty, from their list of 109 things, I count about 70 things that I love too. My question is, does this make me less Black, am I subconsciously practicing allopphillia (emulating other groups not your own), or am I just doing me, and being from a culturally diverse city, have I become an amalgamation of the melting pot? I'm wondering, because I remember when I was a child in "the hood", whenever a young Black person liked something other than the regular hood staples, they were seen as trying to be White. I've never had that problem (maybe because I'm very niggerish), but my very eloquent sister and driven brother did. My sister told me of how she was told "you speak so well", like it was an astronomical feat for an African American female from "the hood" to use proper grammar and diction. My brother was a gifted student (what happened?), so he went to a private school, and anyone from "the hood" that strives for a greater intelligence, is trying to be White. I know for a fact, that my sister and brother don't strive to be or consider themselves to be White or White-like. So I decided to check out some other sites.



There's this other site, entitled Stuff Educated Black People Like. I guess this is a site dedicated to the black entrepreneurs that get rich and move to the Buckhead section of Atlanta. I don't know, maybe I'm an uneducated Black person, but out of their list of about 30 things, I only found 6 things I like (2 would be Barack and boat shoes). Maybe I just don't have that much in common with these educated Black people that they are referring to. Maybe I'm just a little too niggerish for these educated Black people. But, wait, I have so much in common with White people, I must not be too niggerish. What if I swayed so far away from my people, that I don't have anything in common with the educated ones of my ethnic group? Fuck that, I have to do some more research.



So, I look on Google for Stuff Black People Love, and I am reassured of my niggerness. The site is still under construction, it's crude and uncreative, very niggerish. So I hit up the link to their former site, and it was just as crude and uncreative as I would expected. I would tell you the relation of my likes to their list, but it's not numbered and I'm kind of tired. Let's just say, I like damn near everything on their list. I mean, who doesn't love "chinkiness" and finding out that a criminal is not Black. It made me feel totally secure with my niggerness. It brought me so much relief, I had flashbacks to my nigganigans (nigga shenanigans) as a youth, in my Niggeropolis, studying Niggernomics and Niggerology, trying to maintain my Niggerosity. I apologize to anybody that I offended with my use of the N-word. Damn, I apologized, something else to add to my list of things I have in common with White people. Somebody pass me a Newport, some Kool-Aid and let's spark the revolution.



Remember the world is Diggie. Even the "Doodlebug" told you this was a Diggie-ble Planet. I'm cool like that!

Dr. Kanye West or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the New Puff Daddy

The way I'm going to start this post is going to be with a flashback sequence. So, cue the foggy visual and the crappy harp music. I'm going to take you back for a minute. Can you hear the song playing, can you hear it. "Now with Sean on this hot track, melt like it's hot wax", "I was in one bedroom, dreaming of a million", "Put your money on the table and get your math on". You're feeling it now, right? The year is 1997, after successful, critically acclaimed albums by Nas, The Notorious B.I.G., and Wu-Tang Clan, things are about to change. One thing that "Illmatic", "Ready To Die", and "Enter the Wu-Tang (36 Chambers)", is that they all had a grimy New York City street edge to them. These albums, as well as "Only Built 4 Cuban Linx...", "The Coming", "Beats, Rhymes & Life" and albums from other regions, such as "ATLiens", "The Chronic", "Doggystyle", and "The Diary", led to the era between the late 80's and 1996 being coined as the Golden Age of Hip-Hop. Everything was right with the world, until, a young man from Harlem, New York, by the name of Sean John Combs, came to change our world. Combs saw the hard edge of rap music and, I guess, he decided to soften it. Combs introduced the Hip-Hop world to Cristal (actually, Wu-Tang introduced it), the shiny suits (actually, Dr. Dre), heavy sampling (Premo did it, only better), he reintroduced dancing (a la Hammer), and jump started the Jiggy movement. On July 1, 1997, "No Way Out" was released, and from there on a bottle would never go un-popped. Following the release of "No Way Out", we were introduced to Bling, Bentleys, brilliant-cuts, and bad music.



Fast forward to our present predicament. There has been a debate going on within Hip-Hop circles for the past few years. A somewhat new (not really new, at all) genre of rap music was introduced to the world, Hipster rap. Some would say that Hipster rap is a sub genre of Alternative rap (alternative to what exactly). A lot of people would trace Alternative rap back to Mos Def, Talib Kweli, and others. I agree, these acts are different from the mainstream Hip-Hop acts that are shown on BET or played on your local stations. Now, I wouldn't trace Hipster rap back to these acts, but rather to one act, Kanye West. You all know the lyrics, "What if somebody from the Chi, that was ill, got a deal / on the hottest rap label around? / But he was talking bout coke and birds, it was more like spoken word...". In this new era of Hip-Hop, where everyone was a drug dealer, turned rapper, turned baller (kind of a mix of Golden Age themes and Jiggy Era subject), Kanye was praised for being different. He was the child of a professor, his father was a photojournalist / ex-Black Panther. He attended college. He rapped about personal issues, Jesus Christ, fashion, politics, etc.. While the rest of the Hip-Hop nation was either leaning and rocking with it or flipping birds, West was finding ways to stay away from the norm. Contrary to popular belief (and T-Pain), Mr. West introduced the rap world to the "Auto-Tune" (a crappy computerize version of the Talk-Box made famous by Roger Troutman and Parliament/Funkadelic). His over the top wardrobe and stage shows have made him a style icon. And in 2004, with the release of "The College Dropout", Mr. West changed the game, in the same manner as Puff Daddy did back in 1997. After Kanye's success with being "different", other rappers came out and attempted to shine by being "different". From Kanye came Lupe Fiasco, who raps about robots and manga (and dresses like a drunk Kanye, I like to refer to him as "Kanye Lite"), Kid Sister, who raps about nails and beepers (and only has a deal because she's dating Kanye's DJ), The Cool Kids, who rap about nothing, like a "Seinfeld" episode (and wear the tightest jeans I've ever seen), Jay Electronica, Kid Cudi, Wale, Izza Kizza, and sometimes Kidz in the Hall (who I wouldn't put in the same category as the rest of these sucky people, they are actually good). I guess most people define Hipster rappers as people with a fascination with retro clothing and 80's culture (half these kids didn't even grow up in the 80's), and dress different from the status-quo (even though once everyone is wearing it, it makes it the norm), and most often, wear tight jeans (especially them damn Cool Kids). Some people have said that Hipster rap doesn't exist, but I believe it does, and it sucks. All these young kids, they're reminiscing bout an era that bred AIDS, crack and Ronald Reagan, name one thing good about the 80's (besides this fly Sergio Tacchini suit and dope pair of Troops'). I mean, seriously, if I wanted to listen to nonsensical 80's type music, I'd blow the dust off of "Youngest in Charge" and listen to Special Ed rap about his dog's solid gold bone. Why would I want a pale imitation of the music that I grew up on? Thanks to Kanye West, everyday I am surrounded by tight jeans and DayGlo sneakers. My delicate eyes are bombarded with pictures from Complex magazine in real life. Come on now, his influence is so embedded in Hip-Hop that they have sites dedicated to dressing like Kanye West (oh lord, why?). I don't know about anybody else, but I can't wait until the new thing comes and outshines Hipster rap. I'm starting to hate thinking that I'm in Juice whenever I'm riding the train, looking behind my back at the kid with the Bishop hair cut (get a Caesar, nigga).

Remember the world is Diggie. Even the "Ladybug" told you this was a Diggie-ble Planet. I'm cool like that!




Editors Note : Before any smart ass says it, let me clear it up. Andre 3000 is not responsible for Hipster rap! Even though he was rhyming about alternative subject matter and dressing as crazy as he could, people didn't call him groundbreaking, they called him weird. Not until Kanye West came and did the same thing that Andre had already been doing, did it become innovative and forward thinking. It is funny, however, that years after Andre lived as an outcast (get it), he is now getting the recognition that he deserves.

Sly Fox?

So, as most people know, Nas and MoveOn.org have issued a fatwā on the Fox News Channel. Nas and his cohorts claim that Fox is spreading racist propaganda, and they must be stopped. The group has gotten a petition signed and even protested in fron of the Fox News studios last week. Now, what did all this hullabaloo accomplish? Well, the answer is, not a Goddamn thing!



Okay, I agree with Nas and MoveOn.org in their assessment of the overtly racist propaganda that Fox News spews, but I disagree with their petition and their protest. Before you call me an Uncle Tom or a Sambo, hear me out. Now Nas is a rapper, a group that is constantly under fire for their speech, and MoveOn.org's slogan is "Democracy in Action" (typing on a computer is more like Democracy Inaction). One of the main tenents of democracy is the freedom of speech. While Nas defends his own right to freedom of speech, he wants to censor Fox News freedom of speech. Furthermore, anybody that watches Fox News, CNN, MSNBC, etc., knows that the majority of their programming is made up of punditry. Punditry is opinions, analysis, or commentary on news subjects, sort of like an editorial in a newspaper (I know that nobody reads these anymore). Unlike a newspaper, where most of it is made up of hard news (except Page 6 in the New York Post or the entire New York Times), these news channels only feature small breaks of hard news. Many "media watchdogs" have said that CNN and MSNBC have been bias, at times liberal and at times conservative. The Fox News Channel just happens to be staggeringly conservative. What are these protesters actually fighting against, Fox News or the people that watch it? I mean, I hate BET, but I won't protest it, I just refuse to watch the crap. In my opinion, Fox News can say whatever they want, if you don't like it, change the channel. The only people I want to see banned are Ann Coulter (annoying cunt), Al Sharpton (advantageous scavenger) and Jesse Jackson (nigger) (oh, yeah and Tiffany "New York" Pollard). I know I havent cursed much in this blog entry, so, man fuck Fox News!

Even when WINNING isn't probable, losing isn't optional!

Breathe!!!!!!!!!

So, I'm watching Penn & Teller : Bullshit, and the topic of this episode was "Being Green". I've never discussed the whole "Green Movement" before on this blog, so I figure now is a better time than ever. For anybody that hasn't been alive for the past 35 years, the "Green Movement" is a push by environmentalist to get everybody to do their part in "saving the world". Now for my view, environmentalist are the worst perpertrators of "Earth murder". Environmentalist spout off their ideology about "Reduce, Reuse, Recycle", anybody that went to public school in New York City has probably been to an assembly about it. That is one of the biggest pieces of bullshit that I've ever heard! First of all, we cannot reduce our "carbon" output, with our ever growing population, our over production of items, and our expansion of land use. What are we suppose to stop procreating, eating, and living. Ever couple months these "environmentalist" build Whole Foods Markets and other "environmental" centers, using land. They say reuse, how are we going to reuse the current gas-powered automobiles, that they want to replace with hybrids and electric cars. These electric cars and hybrids require new stations to refill their batteries, and that means more land use. Even if we reuse certain items, eventually they will have to be disposed of, and some things, like plastic, are not biodegradable, and will have an impact on the planet anyway. Some products lose their integrity after usage and become hazardous to consumers. And the last word, recycling, is my biggest pet peeve. Almost everyday, I drive by a recycling center, I watch the smog come out the pipes and I think, how is this any better? The "environmentalist" never tell you about the energy cost for recycling centers and the cost of recycling centers. Recycling takes more time than virgin production and that means more money for employees, which means higher prices. The "Green Movement" is a racket (like organized religion), all these organic (expensive) products, these "green" businesses, and environmentalist groups. These things are set up to get money by playing on the guilt of consumers (sort of like how religions get offerings off of their parishioners guilt). I will not say that Global Warming is a myth, I believe it's truely occuring, but these environmentalist are using this to prey on peoples fears (like George W. Bush and Fox News, and religion, again). People are going out of their way to waste money on hybrids, carbon credits and other nonsense that won't neccessarily effect the Global Warming threat. What we need to do is spend that money to fund actual scientific endevours to investigate Global Warming and not do whatever Al Gore says (when he doesn't even do it).

Even when WINNING isn't probable, losing isn't optional!

If the world was really mine, I'd get rid of the snakes!

The Miseducation of Rock Diggie!

So, this is the triumphant return of The Incredible Rock Diggie (not as exciting as you expected, huh! Well, fuck it!). Well, it was kind of hard for me to think of some pertinent subject matter to return with. I could return with my usual Hip-Hop blog (but what has Hip-Hop gave us in the past year), or politics (Obama's the man, nothing there), maybe my polemic view of religion (too deep to return with). I can't really decide, so I've got Nas' "Nigger" ("untitled", fuck that bullshit) playing in background, The Colbert Report on the television, a Heineken sitting next to the keyboard, my Palm Centro in front of me with cracked.com queued up, and a cigarette in my mouth, and I've decided I'm going to wing it and see where it goes.

So, the other day I was vibing hard off the new Nas album "Nigger" (again, fuck "untitled"). I am proud to say that I am back to being Nas' biggest fan. Lyrically, Nas is sharp as he's ever been. As I listened to the "Street Disciple", I started drifting back into my adolescence. Let me give you all an outlook on my youth. I was raised by a family of intellectuals, we spent family time answering questions on Jeopardy. My brother was an advanced student in school (I'm too damn lazy), my sister was a purveyor of art, fashion and anything outside of the "hood" mentality, my mother pushed us to work hard, and my father taught us to search for the answer to every question (probably why I'm such a big skeptic). So in my younger years, I had mainly these four people guiding me. My brother taught me everything scholastic, in our free time we use to read encyclopedias (between comic books and television). My sister plugged me into Hip-Hop, fashion, and interculturalism. My mother showed me that hard work is the path to achieving success (something I still haven't got the hang of). And my father gave me the tools to find the history and the origins of anything. I took everything that my mother, father, sister and brother taught me and formed an amalgamation, that is the basis for my current ideology. My mother, being the strongest person I've ever met, gave me the strength to fall down and get back up. My father, the most philosophical person I know, showed me how to find the deeper meaning in everything. My sister, a very sophisticated person, taught me to be an epicurean (but not to the point of avariciousness). My brother, by forcing me to read books, pushed me to further my intelligence. I know this isn't like one of my standard blog entries, but listening to Nas' "Nigger" (again, fuck "untitled"), the things he said just reminded me of my youth. The parallels of him and I growing up in the hood of Queens, the outlook on America. His lyrics about African American leaders reminded me of the discussions with my father. The mentions of beliefs of Nuwaubianism that I was raised around. It just brought me back to the days of my childhood. I just wanted to dedicate a blog entry to the people that crafted The Incredible Rock Diggie.

Even when WINNING isn't probable, losing isn't optional!

I'm going to leave you all with a video, since I feel like I kind of ripped you off on the Grand Re-Opening.